REM wisdom, part 2
Now, it's my turn.
One of my dreams last night had me scared like I haven't been in a loooong time!
My mom and I were at my Gramma's apartment in Colorado. It didn't look exactly like it, but it FELT like it. We are cleaning out her stuff, as she has just died.
All of a sudden, my Gramma appears right beside me! It doesn't look her from recent times, her hair is darker. She is wearing her blue duster and she is mad!!! When she opens her mouth, she still has some teeth left. I never saw my Gramma with real teeth. She wore dentures for most of my life, so this was even scarier for me.
I look over at my mom and I say, "Can't you see her???!!" ( I am panicking by this time.)
My mom looks at me and says, "Oh, yes."
She doesn't believe me!!! In fact, she's placating me to get the job done.
At this point, my Gramma's presence shoves to the floor. She is breathing on me. She is very angry!!! I am totally freaked at this point. I am screaming, "Get her off!"
My mom is still looking at me like I am nuts...She huffs and moves into another room. I push myself up and say, "I need air."
Mom and I head to the door and into the cool Colorado night.
I woke up just frightened outta my skull. Talk about Jungian theory! Classic text book!
I realized this whole situation with my mom and Gramma has had me in the middle and on the floor. I now know my mom didn't believe me or in me. I had to take a step back (or out the door.) That was scary for me. And I guess I am afraid I might have hurt my Gramma through all of this. Not that I did, but I still have the unresolved guilt and fear that goes with greiving. I just can't describe how scary it was to see my Gramma's ghost. EW!
3 comments:
my maternal grandmother has visited me several times since her death... my paternal grandmother has not... my mother-in-law visited me in a dream once soon after her death... i found these visits comforting... i've also had many, many dreams that have taken place in some variation of both of my grandmother's and my mother-in-law's homes... i have learned much about my journey from all of these dreams... they have both reassured and guided me
take some time for reflection and introspection... the message will come... it isn't always what first comes to mind
perhaps your grandmother is angry because you still believe your mother's opinion of you and she wants you to stop believing your mother and start believing in yourself
i thought about that. and perhaps she was angry becuz my mom was with me... it was scary, for sure!
there could be all sorts of explanations... "just sit with it" as our purple-feathered boa queen of the angels would say... it will come to you!
Post a Comment